AccountEveryday practice
How to regulate your emotions every day
Regulation is built in ordinary moments, not only in emergencies.
By the My Easy Therapy team · Published
My Easy Therapy was founded by Dr Michaela Dunbar, Clinical Psychologist. About Dr Michaela and the approach behind the app
The short answer
Regulating your emotions day to day comes down to three small habits: noticing how you feel before it peaks, settling your body when it is activated, and choosing a response rather than reacting on autopilot. Practices such as slow breathing with a longer out-breath, naming what you feel, and a short daily check-in are simple enough to repeat. Repetition is the point: brief, regular practice when you are calm makes the same skills easier to reach when you are not.
You may benefit from a daily practice if
- You only notice how you feel once you are already overwhelmed.
- Your reactions feel bigger than the moment that caused them.
- You know what helps, but you cannot reach it when you need it.
- Calm feels like something that happens to you, not something you can return to.
Start by noticing, earlier
Most regulation fails because it starts too late. A brief check-in at the same time each day (what am I feeling, where do I feel it, how strong is it from one to ten) trains you to catch the early signals: a clenched jaw, a shorter fuse, a busy mind.
Noticing earlier gives you more options. A feeling at three out of ten is far easier to work with than the same feeling at nine.
Settle the body with a slower out-breath
When you are activated, your body leads and your thinking follows. Slowing your breathing, especially lengthening the out-breath, is one of the most accessible ways to signal safety. The NHS suggests a simple version: breathe in gently, then breathe out slowly, for a few minutes.
Reviews of slow-breathing research link it with changes in heart rate variability and with feeling calmer, though studies vary in quality. It is a practice to try, not a cure.
Build a rhythm you can keep
A few minutes a day you actually do beats an hour you plan and skip. Attach the practice to something you already do: after your morning coffee, before you open email, when you sit in the car.
Expect it to feel small. The effect builds over weeks, as noticing and settling become quicker and more automatic.
Source: Zaccaro et al. (2018): a systematic review of slow breathing
For more on what regulation is and is not, read our complete guide to emotional regulation.
What tends to backfire
- Only practising in a crisis, when the skill is hardest to reach.
- Choosing a routine so long it lasts three days.
- Treating a hard day as proof that it is not working.
- Holding your breath or breathing fast and deep, which can leave you light-headed.
When to seek professional support
If your anxiety, mood or exhaustion is interfering with daily life, or you are having thoughts of harming yourself, please speak to a GP, a qualified therapist, or a crisis line in your country. Reaching for professional support is strength, not failure, and everything here works alongside it, never instead of it.
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The app is built around exactly this daily rhythm.
- Daily Calm is a short guided session each day, written by Dr Michaela.
- The daily check-in builds the habit of noticing, and grows your garden.
- Regulate has breathing and body-based practices for difficult moments.
Explore your own pattern
- Emotional Regulation QuizHow well do you regulate your emotions?Regulation isn’t about feeling less. It’s about not being swept away by what you feel. This quiz helps you see how you tend to meet your emotions.12 questions · ~2 minTake the quiz →
- Nervous System QuizIs my nervous system dysregulated?When your system is stuck on high alert or shut down, it is not a flaw in you. It is a body doing its best to keep you safe. This quiz helps you see the pattern.12 questions · ~2 minTake the quiz →
- Burnout QuizAm I burnt out, or just tired?High-functioning burnout hides behind still-getting-it-done. This quiz helps you tell the difference between needing rest and running on empty.12 questions · ~2 minTake the quiz →
Get the right support for how you feel today
Join My Easy Therapy for a short Daily Calm session each day, with Iris there for in-the-moment support whenever something happens.
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From women inside My Easy Therapy
Shared anonymously. Personal experiences, not typical results.
Individual experiences: real reflections, not typical results.
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